I’ve only written 565 words today. That’s kind of sorry, and I won’t let myself finish the day like that. It’s only 5:30pm — that gives me a good four hours to get that number up before bedtime.
(UPDATE: I’m finishing the day at 1,215 words and 92,718 total for the manuscript.)
But per the title of this post, I’ve been thinking about the self-imposed limitations I have (we have). On Friday, I had an unexpected day off and set out to write about 3,000 words. I chose the number 3,000 because I told myself, “That’s about all I can do in a day.” Later I started to question that.
But why is 3,000 all I can do in a day?
I’ve certainly written more than that in a day. I think the most I ever wrote was about 6,000 or 7,000 words in a day. Where did this idea, “3,000 is all I can do in a day” come from?
Despite having no real obligations on Friday, I ended up stopping at about 2,800 words — just shy of that 3,000. And I felt pretty satisfied. But that question — “Why is 3,000 my ceiling?” — kept nagging at me.
And I realized it’s just bullcrap.
Another self-imposed limitation?
“I can’t write at night. After about 8pm, I’m toast.”
Now granted, I think it IS true that I don’t do my best work at night. I’m just a morning person; I prefer using my creative energy first thing in the morning. Writing between about 6am and 10am is pretty ideal for me. The later the day gets, the more sludgy writing becomes.
But is it true that I literally CAN’T write at night?
Like if someone held a gun to my head at 8pm and said, “Write or I will pull the trigger!”, would I write? Of course I would!!!
Don’t wait for motivation, either.
Yesterday, a day when I only managed about 1,200 words (why? because I spent the day binge-watching Mindhunter on Netflix, of course), I complained to my friend about how little writing I accomplished and she was immediately like, “No, you can’t push yourself! It’s bad for you and it’s bad for your writing!”
I mean, I hear what she’s saying, but if I never pushed myself, I’d never finish anything. I like what David Goggins has to say:
I <3 David Goggins.
Likewise with “inspiration.”
Stephen King says inspiration is for amateurs. I also like this quote I found:
For a writer with so many books to his credit, he finds writing an exceedingly difficult process of “gritting one’s teeth and putting down one word after another.” He averages 1500 to 2000 words a day and likes to quote William Faulkner: “I only write when inspiration strikes. Fortunately it strikes at nine every morning.”
– from a 1966 Washington Post profile on writer Herman Wouk. Pulled this quote from here.
What are the self-imposed limitations you are giving yourself right now that keep you from doing your best work?
And it might not be writing for you, but it’s something.
2 Comments
Sarah · August 19, 2019 at 1:52 pm
Most of my limitations come from physical impairment, but goodness knows I’ve got plenty of mental blocks stopping me from doing what I want to, too. Guilt, I think, is the biggest- the feeling that if I’m summoning the energy from the depths of my soul to do something, I should be doing something more productive than something I want to or enjoy doing. Especially as the to-do pile grows even faster than the want-to-do pile does, and deep down I’m a perfectionist and want everything done, done well, and last week. I try to be kind to myself and take something off the fun pile once in a while- because let’s face it, the to-do pile will always be there! It’s hard to strike a balance, especially for someone so driven as you seem to be, as I used to be before. It’s hard to manage and balance our expectations of ourselves, sometimes circumstances force us to face them head-on. It’s still a constant struggle. You are not alone in this battle of the brain! I’ve had to learn to accept that whatever you do manage to do, it’s something.
The Real Person!
Yes, the to-do list will always be there — there will never be a point at which EVERYTHING has been accomplished. I realized this some years back, and it was actually kind of relieving, because it gave me permission to relax. I had this idea “I will relax when ____ is finished,” and then understood that “____” will never actually be finished. Knowing that enabled me to recognize that it’s okay to rest sometimes when exhaustion / overwork is about to devour us. LOL